Europe’s Strangest Museums, Part I

The Mona Lisa. The Starry Night. Michelangelo’s David. These are some of the works of art you can find in Europe’s top museums. Places like the Louvre, the Uffizi and the British Museum are on everybody’s itinerary the first time they travel around Europe. But what about the 101st visit? Just as it’s full of a wide variety of people, ranging from the eccentric to the downright strange, Europe also boasts a wide variety of museums filling the same range. Here are some of the strangest.

The Icelandic Phallological Museum, Husavik, Iceland

For those of you who don’t know right away what the word “phallological” means, here are two hints: It describes something men have got and ladies haven’t; something that is necessary for the continuation of every species on the planet. That’s right. Tiny Husavik, Iceland, one of the northernmost cities in Europe is home to the largest penis museum on the planet. Speaking of largest, the Icelandic Phallological Museum offers several samples from whales, as well as horses, cows, dogs, wolves and every animal you can imagine, right down to the lowliest interest. Not surprisingly, the one species they’re missing is man. But according to the proprietor, who has spent decades amassing his collection, he has had quite a number of customers offer to leave him a “gift” after they kick the bucket. Husavik is also home to whale-watching and also boasts a few cosy accommodations.

Currywurst Museum, Berlin, Germany

Is it in bad taste to go from a penis museum to a sausage museum? It might be, except for the fact that currywurst tastes so darned good! Welcome to the museum that honors Berlin’s greatest culinary passion. The ketchup-red Currywurst Museum gives you the opportunity to get behind a sausage stand and see what it’s like to spread joy to your fellow human being. Here you can learn all about the currywurst’s illustrious history, as well as what goes into it. Whatever you think of the exhibits, the Currywurst Museum is probably the best smelling museum in the world, with the currywurst sizzling, just waiting to be covered in a sauce of tomato, curry powder, spices and Worcestershire sauce. If you have any doubt of the importance of currywurst to the locals, just consider the museum’s location, right next to the prime tourist attraction of Checkpoint Charlie. The museum is also near many great Berlin hotels.

Elvisly Yours, London

London and Memphis are about as far apart in just about every way you can imagine. Well, expect one. They both have museums celebrating the King of Rock and Roll. And while Elvis never actually lived in Elvisly Yours, as he did in Graceland, this kitschy museum certainly has its heart in the right place. Here you’ll find just about every kind of Elvis memorabilia you can imagine. Elvis jewelry, Elvis sunglasses, Elvis T-shirts, Elvis art posters, Elvis clocks, watches, calendars, magazines and stamps. And of course the Elvis music never stops. But if you’re a US citizen, I have some bad news for you. Because Elvis Presley Enterprises has a government-protected monopoly on Elvis products, the museum is not allowed to sell you any souvenirs. So before you hit the check-out, be sure to brush up on your British accent. While you won’t find a Heartbreak Hotel anywhere nearby, there are still hundreds of London hotels from which to choose.

Catacombes de Paris, Paris, France

If you want to rub shoulders with Parisians from the 18th century and beyond, there are over six million waiting to meet you just below Denfert-Rochereau. Welcome to the Catacombes de Paris. Where else will you find room after endless room of bones piled up and artfully displayed in every configuration you can imagine? Just 286 steps down a narrow spiral staircase you’ll be greeted by a sign stating “Arrête! C’est ici l’empire de la mort.” (“Stop! This is the empire of death.”). The sign doesn’t do much to keep tourists out, and the catacombs, which were stocked after Paris’s cemeteries passed their capacity in 1810, were also used as a hiding place for the French Resistance during World War II. Only a tiny portion of the 300 kilometres of catacombs (that’s 11,000 square metres) are open to the public. But that’s plenty enough to get the feel of the place. The entrance is just opposite the Denfert-Rochereau metro station, and if you don’t mind sleeping atop all those old Parisians, the Hotel du Lion is the closest hotel.

Museum of Witchcraft, Bocastle, England

Known more for as a destination for innocent beach holidays and communing with nature in the picturesque countryside, Cornwall also has a darker side. This can be explored in the Museum of Witchcraft. Located in the charming town of Boscastle for the last fifty years, this is the world’s largest collection of witchcraft related artifacts and paraphernalia. The founder of the museum, Cecil Williamson, is nearly as interesting as the museum itself. A dabbler in the occult, Williamson was also an undercover agent in the MI6 during World War II who collected information on the occult interests of leading Nazi military personnel. The museum offers exhibits on everything from devil worship and Satanism to the persecution of witches, along with
old-fashioned dipping chairs and a library of over 3,000 books on witchcraft and the occult. And don’t miss the Richel Collection, one of the world’s best collections of ritual/sex magic artifacts that has been in the museum’s collection since 2000. Just be sure when you check into your Boscastle hotel that you avoid black cats and that you don’t go under any ladders.