Europe’s Sex Museums

If you thought going to a museum was all about impressionists, cubists, Roman sculptures and old furniture, think again. Since the 1980s a whole new crop of erotic museums and sex museums have been popping up (so to speak) all over Europe, from frozen Saint Petersburg to sizzling Barcelona and every place in between. Each museum is different, boasting its own specialty and each one is quite entertaining.

Erotic Museum, Amsterdam

The granddaddy of Europe’s sex museums, Amsterdam’s Erotic Museum has been open since the 80s. Set in an old warehouse, the Erotic Museum is quiet appropriately situated in the heart of the city’s iconic Red Light District, a sex museum in its own right. Beyond the 17th century façade, whose ancient screed “God is mijn Burgh” (God is my Castle) ironically overlooks the entrance, are five floors of eroticism. In addition to a wax model of a working girl, a constantly playing x-rated version of Snow White and a collection of vintage erotic photos, the museum features many non-erotic exhibits, like its collection of John Lennon lithographs. Though you may not choose to spend the night in the Red Light District, there are many nice Amsterdam hotels surprisingly close.

Musée de l’érotisme, Paris

From the city of sex we go to the city of love. Even the name, Musée de l’érotisme, evokes romance. Open since 1997, Paris’s entry into the sex museum sweepstakes features the erotic art collection of antique dealer Alain Plumey and French teacher Jo Khalifa. Set in the city’s Pigalle District, the museum has a wide-reaching collection that is as classy as its Dutch counterpart is kitschy. Ancient religious art of India, Japan and Africa rub shoulders with contemporary art with an erotic focus over five floors of exhibitions. One floor is devoted to maisons closes, the legal brothels of the 19th and early twentieth centuries, and a collection of pornographic shorts that were exhibited in these brothels, called Polisson et galipettes is also screened. The Pigalle District boasts many hotels, romantic and otherwise, as does the rest of the city.

Beate Uhse Erotik-Museum, Berlin

The sex museum goes high-tech in Berlin’s Beate Uhse Erotik-Museum, a slick, modern museum featuring interactive exhibits, 3D projections, games and more than 30 LED screens. Here you can see over 5,000 items from around the world, from Indian and Asian erotic miniatures to 2,000 year-old Peruvian drinking vessels to African fertility masks. Don’t miss the carved Balinese phalli, and don’t miss the museum shop and the life-sized dioramas depicting sadism, masochism, fetishism and more. If nothing else you’ll walk away remembering the Japanese shunga art, featuring its oversized genitalia and the Chinese Wedding Tiles are also worth a look. Sex education was never so beautiful. And of course, Berlin has a long list of accommodation choices.

Sex Machines Museum, Prague

The name of this 2002 museum says it all. Located right in Old Town Square, among all the medieval buildings, there are some items in the Sex Machines Museum that are, appropriately, quite medieval. The only museum in the world solely dedicated to sex machines, the museum features toys and sexual aids going all the way back to the 1500s in its 200 item collection. Body harnesses and copulation tables are on display, as well as “coercive” chairs designed for absolute domination. You won’t soon forget the Asian “Magic Box” palanquin with its sliding peepholes or the throne chairs their strategically-placed holes designed for oral pleasure. Other items include chastity belts from the 1580s, whose clawed teeth must have been quite effective, as well as the comparably mild shoes worn by Greek prostitutes, which have the sentence “follow my steps” engraved on the soles so that they could leave an imprint on the ground. Set in the centre of the city, the museum is just steps away from many Prague hotels.

The Icelandic Phallological Museum, Húsavík

Though not strictly a sex museum, Húsavík’s Icelandic Phallological Museum has the largest collection of penises gathered anywhere in the world. Don’t worry. They’re not human. In fact, the 272 specimens come from the wide and wild world of the animal kingdom. Exhibits range from the tiniest insect to the largest whale, with all sorts of horses, lizards, cats, dogs and more. There are penises under glass, penises mounted on the walls like trophies and penises floating in formaldehyde It really must be seen to be believed, and the proprietor, Sigurður Hjartarson, a former teacher of history, encourages photographs and discussion. He’s very proud of the collection he’s amassed over the years, and love the museum or hate it, you’ll always remember it. After the museum, you can head to the bay for a whale-watching tour, and then it’s on to one of Húsavík’s charming hotels.